HAY my boobs hurt. So, you know, yay for that. Fingers crossed that they inflate a bit, mmmkay?
Also, an official announcement. The pants I wore for transfer are now uncomfortable to button. Wore them half the day, decided I didn’t like being cut in half, am now wearing stretchy gauchos. At a piddily 10 weeks. There is much sadness in the room. Am officially plump-but-also-pregnant chick. Buddy bringing an elliptical over in a week or so to live in my garage and help me reduce the plump part while retaining the pregnant-chick part. Will not admit as to my total to-date weight gain, discovered at my 2nd midwife appointment last Tuesday. But I will say that I’m betting a handful of flub that the bulk of that extra was from the Dexamethasone. Which I hated. So I only claim half the weight gain, which is still a shameful number. Gah.
Speaking of last Tuesday… was SHOCKED to see my midwife whip out the Doppler during my exam. SHOCKED. Isn’t it a bit early?? Even more shocking..the almost instant budda-bump of little Cletus’s heart heard loud and clear upon application of same said slimy Doppler. Called Mama, Cletus moved to hide under my pubic bone so she had to wait, but eventually I got to share with her the sound of her childs heart. Beating. Happy and healthy. It was an awesome moment. I teared up & blubbered, my midwife teared up and blubbered, the assistant that came in later to draw my blood had teared up and blubbered….. Note to self; bring tissue. It seems my appointment will be filled with blubbering. Either the watery-eye kind or the jiggily-gut kind. Both require a measure of tissue.
The big news this week: Hands and feet are emerging from developing arms and legs — although they look more like paddles at this point than the tiny, pudgy extremities you’re daydreaming about holding and tickling. Technically, your baby is still considered an embryo and has something of a small tail, which is an extension of her tailbone. The tail will disappear within a few weeks, but that’s the only thing getting smaller. Your baby has doubled in size since last week and now measures half an inch long, about the size of a blueberry.see inside your womb, you’d spot eyelid folds partially covering her peepers, which already have some color, as well as the tip of her nose and tiny veins beneath parchment-thin skin. Both hemispheres of your baby’s brain are growing, and her liver is churning out red blood cells until her bone marrow forms and takes over this role. She also has an appendix and a pancreas, which will eventually produce the hormone insulin to aid in digestion. A loop in your baby’s growing intestines is bulging into her umbilical cord, which now has distinct blood vessels to carry oxygen and nutrients to and from her tiny body.
Your uterus has doubled in size in the past five weeks, and eating may feel like a chore — or worse — thanks to morning sickness, which by now may be in full swing. (If you’re feeling fine, don’t worry — you’re lucky!)pee more than usual, too, thanks to your increasing blood volume and the extra fluid being processed through your kidneys. (By now, you already have about 10 percent more blood than you did before you were pregnant. And by the end of your pregnancy, you’ll have 40 to 45 percent more blood running through your veins to meet the demands of your full-term baby.) As your uterus grows, pressure on your bladder will send you to the bathroom as well. About half of the women who feel nauseated during the first trimester will find complete relief by about 14 weeks. For most of the rest, it’ll take another month or so for the queasiness to ease up. It’s unlikely, though, that the need to pee more than usual will ease up. In fact, research shows that both the frequency and volume of urine tends to increase over the course of pregnancy.
* whoa, uterus has doubled in size?? That’s a lot of flopping around!
* have definately noticed the blood volume increase already. My normal pregnancy strawberry marks are out in full color and I’ve had to add piles iron to my diet to keep myself on an even keel. Just for fun I also added vitamin D, vitamin C, and DHA to my regular horse sized prenatal vitamin. I seem to enoy taking gobs of pills.
* have had tiny introductions with nausea, but nothing too bad. Which is good, but at the same time I like a little green-face to remind me that things are moving along as they should. So oddly, I’m asking for pro-nausea vibes from my ‘peeps.
* I’m officially off the Dexamethasone. Looking forward to dumping some of this insane water weight, althouth I’m peeing everyother hour as it is, so not really looking forward to that little side effect increasing.
* Can still feel the PIO lumps in my hips, but kind of like the reminder of what we’ve gotten past. Is that sad or what, lol!
* Am finding that I much prefer a daily nap. We’re getting to -that- part of the game, with the tired all the time. The other day I hit the hay at 9pm.. when my usual time of sleep is closer to 1am.
Little “Cletus” looks AWESOME!! Measuring exact for dates with a beautiful heart rate of 114 beats per minute, Cletus is growing just exactly as s/he should be. And… there is just one Cletus.
Also, yet another tech mentioned, with surprise, my floppy uterus. Oh, the ego boost. But I forgive her because when she learned this was a surrogate pregnancy she got all a-twitter and said whatever I wanted to do to share the news, I should go ahead and do it. I was allowed to video when normally, that’s a huge no-no. YAY for good medical workers!
Look carefully at the center of the grey blip in the middle of the black circle. See that little flicker? That right there is a happy healthy beating baby heart. Congrats, Mama ( and Daddy!) this is one big milestone to have gotten past.
Also, OMG whoa… just got off the phone with the clinic and I didn’t know it till now, but apparently last night was my VERY LAST INJECTION!!! My BOTTOM SAYS YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m off the progesterone injections, will be weaning off of the Dexamethasone, and will continue the progesterone/e2v suppositories till 10 weeks ( ick.. but at least no needles, right?!) Also…………. I am being released to my OB!!!! But you know what that really means this time? I’m being released to my MIDWIFE!!!! Yep, Jaymee & M have agreed to let me birth at the local birthing center under the care of a midwife!!!!!!!!!!! SQUEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!This is such a dream of mine!!! My OB is fantastic, but he is also somewhat clinical, likes his pitocin and epidurals….. I am SO flippin’ excited that I get to birth naturally this time!!! I can not wait to be in that place with this new family coming into the world. Can. Not. Wait. So giant SQUEEEE again. If you’d like to SQUEEEEE as well that’d be fine.
Today is my 30th birthday and as a gift to myself, I made an appointment with the weenie wand to make sure things are starting out nicely.
Cletus says HI!
I go back again next week, and hopefully by then we’ll be able to see a little heart beating!
Went in today for our follow-up BETA test.
Okay, so ever since I lost that wee little one of P-Daddies, I don’t trust pregnancies. Positive test, yah. Decent BETA number, great. But you really never know when/why/how a pregnancy could end.. be it birth or death. It’s horrifying to me, and I only had to do it once! So I really really want to be just plain excited about this pregnancy. I really really want to just be happy and peaceful and positive about it, because growing a little someone is just simply magic.
We got our BETA results back, and I’ve decided to just fake it till I feel it. Our number was 239…. That’s a doubling time of just over 41 hours, a really great result. It means that today right now this second, this is a happy healthy little bub who is growing just as s/he should. That is something to feel joy about. Which I do. I’ve decided to…. um…. refuse to feel trepidation or nervousness about the next 9 or so weeks that we’ll still be in the “danger zone”. Danger zone? What danger zone? We’ll call it, instead, the….. dancing zone ( as in dancing with joy?) or the… dunking zone ( as in, I just know my head will make it to the toilet more then a handful of times in the coming weeks) or the…. delightful zone. Or something. I have decided to give in my need to be painfully optimistic. I have decided to give in to the happy and joy. I’ve got to. Happy vibes and hormones are good for you and I am, after all, pregnant.
So, transfer. First, I want to discuss the urban myth that RE’s are high pressure assholes. Everyone knows this is not true. No real RE would pull an uber-jackass move and insist a transfer was destined to fail unless multiple embryos are transferred. One absolutely wouldn’t do so when their client is laying nekkid on the table, legs strapped down, spotlight of shame in place along with a speculum placing some super comfy pressure on an over-full bladder. Everyone knows this doesn’t really happen in the real world…..
Yah, that happened. We have always said one embryo. Always. There has never been any discussion of more than one embryo. We were super thrilled to learn of how healthy our little frosty was after thaw, the embryologist was full of praise and gave us some pictures and everything, it was awesome. Then there I am, strapped down, lady bits hanging out with the tools of the trade in place, when the RE leans out the door and calls for the embryos. Embryo(s). As in, more then one. Whaaaaaa……..?? Jaymee sits up and says we’re only transferring ONE, right? We agreed to just transfer ONE… and this is when the RE turned in to a giant jackass. Giant. He hemmed and hawed and acted like we’d just shot ourselves in the head at that moment, stating the low statistical success rates bla bla bla… he was totally unethical and in appropriate, especially since Jaymees husband, the father of these child(ren) wasn’t present for this discussion and I was, you know, already naked on the table. In the end we did (just) transfer one beautiful healthy little blast, goe a very heartfelt “good luck” from the embryologist, and headed our way back to Casa de Jaymee-family to wait out the rest of the day in peace, our heads swimming at how poorly that was handled. It was a weird transfer experience, to say the least. That night we met up with some sassy ladies from a mutual online surrogacy support group for one of the most fun and giggle inducing evenings I’ve ever had. It was really wonderful to spend some real-life time with these ladies, whom I have been friends with online for two years.
So transfer happened. Because we were bit pretty hard by the pee-on-a-stick bug last time and it just dug our pity-hole deeper then it needed to be, I had decided NOT to do home pregnancy tests this time. I would hold out for the early BETA we’d scheduled. That solid resolve lasted all of 5 days. A late night call with one of my best buddies, who also happenes to be a pee-on-a-stick addict and all around bad example, had me driving over to Wal*Mart after 11pm to purchase me some pee tests. I didn’t make it out of the store, going straight into the bathrooms there to do the deed. Classy. That’s me.
So. 5 days past the transfer of a 5 day embryo, a frozen one at that and one that our RE assured us was doomed to failure because it wasn’t one of a pile being transferred…………..
I saw this.
The layman may not see it… so here’s the 6dp5dt pee test….
Again, may be hard to see for those of you not trained in the special brand of eye strain necessary for true pee-on-things obsession… Maybe this will make things easier….
That was yesterday. Todays two First Response pregnancy tests developed a results line BEFORE a test line. Crazy dark pink. So when I got the results back form our two days early BETA, I wasn’t surprised to hear the giant number of 71. Yes folks, seventy freakin’ one. That, at eight days past a 5 day FROZEN transfer? Is one super duper fantastic awesome number. It’s good. Really really good.
I go in for a second BETA test on Monday, to make sure this number is doubling… which it will be. I am so confident in this one, I really do think that this little bub I’m growing is the one. This is her baby. Their baby. Finally.
Let the countdown begin, Mama. You’re baby will be home soon.
OK, I’m not going to lie, here: these PIO injections are really starting to HURT! Had I only listened to the voices of the “pros” ( and L, don’t you DARE “nanny nanny” me. I’ll hop over to Kansas and kick your pregnant ASS ( softly, of course) should you even try..) I would have saved any of my earlier bitching about these injections for right about now. I can’t sleep on my right side. Folks, that is my default sleeping side! I’m all confused in bed now! I have a baseball sized lump on my right hip that frankly feels like.. crap, not sure how to describe it. OK. It feels like a crumpled up piece of tinfoil.. No, a ball of ice shards…. OK, it feels like I have, under my skin, a pokey ball. I think the PIO, in the formation of this beautiful rump bump, has somehow hardened strands of the muscle into tiny points of ouch that remind me, with much glee, of their presence when I put any pressure on it. Which means that sitting/laying/leaning kind of hurt. A deep bruise hurt combined with the bizarre pokey-ball.
BUT! BUT! Thursday, ladies and gentlemen. Thursday is my LAST day of PIO. As in never again. No more. My bumps are prematurely thankful.
In other pregnancy news, I am apparently one of those lucky pregnant woman that most other pregnant woman want to kill in a most un-ladylike fashion. No morning sickness for me. None. Not even a little bit, despite the loads and loads of estrogen and progesterone I’m forcibly injecting ( and ingesting) into my body every day. This is odd because I had “all day” sickness with both of my previous pregnancies. No huge vomit sessions, but nauseous pretty much 24 hours a day for, oh, 12 weeks or so. Which was not fun, let me tell you. Some information for you, copied and pasted for your convenience:
One of the theories is that morning sickness is caused by the dominant hormone during pregnancy, progesterone. Progesterone has a “softening” effect on the muscles in the body. It is thought it helps prevent preterm labor by effecting the uterine muscles. It also effects other muscles, such as the stomach and intestines. The progesterone relaxes the workings of the whole digestive track which makes the elimination of bodily wastes slower which can lead to a slow emptying of the stomach which leads to excess stomach acids. Another theory, and more widely accepted, is that morning sickness is caused by the buildup of hCG (human chorionic gonadotopin) in your system. hCG is produced after implantation takes place and continues to increase until about the 12th week of your pregnancy, at which point the levels of hCG starts to decrease. If you are lucky, this is when your morning sickness symptoms will start to decrease as well.
What I have been gifted with, however, is an incredibly sensitive sense of smell. This is all new to me so for the first week or so I just thought all the food in my house was rotting. I tossed 2 loaves of bread and cleaned out my fridge of all but the condiments before I realized that ALL food, even at friends homes, smelled rotten. The odds of that; slim. So crap, it must be me.This new development has been a blessing and a curse. I love food. I love to eat. My reward for anything occurs in my mouth. Earned some extra money? Go out to dinner. Want a birthday treat? Open up and say AHHH to some take-out! I love me some eatables. ( I’m shocked I’m not any fluffier than I am). So now, while I still love food, it kind of makes me gag. I mean, I’ll eat it, but the whole time I am doing so I think it smells like feet. You can only ignore that for so long before you decide meh.. maybe not so much of the eating. This has been a blessing because normally, I’m a night snacker. Now, not so much. Unfortunately, it isn’t just food that is affected. My bathrooms are now spotless ( even as I choked on the chemical smells) and I literally have to hold my breath when changing my sons diapers as I almost gagged on him the other day. Which wouldn’t have been very nice.
So that’s the update. Thursday is the next *big* day. I have the 8 week ultrasound in the morning and my first regular OB appointment in the afternoon. Interested to see how that goes… I’m going to the same OB I went to with my son’s birth, so I’m curious how differently he’ll act now with this surrogate pregnancy and with my new demands/requirements. We’ll see…….