Well, the belly-buddy has officially been served his eviction notice. Now it’s just waiting time! That is hard in a thousand different ways, but I do take comfort in knowing that no matter what, in two weeks he’ll be where he belongs, with his family. Do I want to consider a pit induction at a hospital with an OB I don’t know? No, not really. So fingers crossed that he makes the decision making process a moot point and decides to make his entrance all on his own! Tonight would be good… or, you know, tomorrow…. SOON buddy, Okay? Lets do this soon!
First, WHAT in the name of all that is holy was I THINKING??!! Today is day four of progesterone, and I seem to have developed a wee bit of arse-jabbing forgetfulness. I woke up on Friday to the strangest sensation of having been beat in my sleep, Saturday I was sure of it, and today is Sunday.. I am seriously dreading the upcoming arse poke. It’s not the *poke* that hurts, but the bruise to the meat when the gallon and a half of progesterone is injected. Note to self, COOK>POKE>COOK>RUB. Do NOT deviate from the tried-and-true! I’m blaming it on older lump-meat. It’s just not as forgiving as it was two (!) years ago. I had a three-hour drive ( each way) today to go up and grab my mother for babysitting purposes in the upcoming days, and I am not even joking when I say that I nearly FELL DOWN when I got out of the car, so strong was the protest coming from my left arse. Gah. I’m such a weenie.
Second… I had to find a sitter because……. we’re TRANSFERRING on Wednesday!!!!! We ended up with a FANTASTIC retrieval (26) and a statistic finger-giving initial fert. report (17) so I am very much optimistic about this upcoming event. I fly out at a nice comfortable 11am tomorrow, and will fly home in time for dinner Friday. It will be a LONG week away from my kids, and I already miss them. I know they will have a BLAST with Grambonn and may not even notice I’m gone, but I sure will. I miss them already. But I am bound and determined to relax this week, take this transfer trip for the gift that it is and let my body rest to get ready to grow Miss Jaymee & Mr Dad a baby. Also, I am super selfish. We purchased a home and will no longer be the renters that we have been for the last nine years, and I “get” to miss out on the whole mess. My darling helpful husband and buddy from heaven have it all arranged, when I come home it will be to the new house. Yes, they are MOVING me while I’m on transfer vacation. Whoa. I get to come home just in time to put everything away, my absolute FAVORITE part of moving.. that’s not a joke. Re-arranging is something I look forward to like Christmas. Also, I got to go to IKEA today and make a fool of myself in the drapery department. Can this week GET any better???
Gah. Miss Jaymee is broken. Or more likely her geneticist is ( or soon will be, if I get my hands on him). Turns out, after waiting TWENTY FREAKIN’ WEEKS, that miss Jaymee doesn’t have a “dirty” gene to cause her Von Willeband’s disease, but actually just has a pile of genes missing. Huh. You’d think someone would have tested for that at some point. I am just SO angry on her behalf. All this time wasted!
There will be no transfer in September.
Jaymee will dump another twelve gallons of blood into a bucket and ship them off to Europe, where the proper test will be developed in order to find the absence of a gene, rather then trying to make a test to find a “dirty” gene. We will ( fingers crossed ) hopefully have an October transfer. More then likely a November transfer.
I’d back up if I were you, my head may explode all over the screen.
Well, it’s started. That “ready to cycle” cycle that happens before the cycle. I’ve purchased the first in my stepping stones down from my caffeine addiction and filled the pantry with half-caff and decaf coffee. Yum. I’ve also purchased the last addition to my twice weekly personal vacation; a *box of wine. Once it’s gone, it’s gone…. for at least the next year. Stepping down, getting ready to cycle…
*yes, I really did say a ~box~ of wine. I am nothing if not “thrifty”.
Too many pots on the fire means all of my meals are a little bit burnt..
On the second of this month I flew down to Dallas to be greeted at the airport by Jaymee and her incredible mother. I spent a whirlwind mid-week in their beautiful home meeting the family, being (gratefully) over fed, and giving blood. Gallon after gallon of blood. Wednesday saw Jaymee and I at the Sher Institute for Reproductive Medicine where, after a SUPER long wait, we were brought back for some fun. It had to have been seventy two vials of blood, my arm was positively purple from the tourniquet being on for so long. I had to pee in a cup. Then I had to pee in a cup again when they threw out my original pee. WHO THROWS AWAY SOMEONES PERFECTLY DECENT CUP OF PEE??? And then the fun began.
You see, I had a date with the weenie wand.
Our transvaginal ultrasound was both fun and entertaining. As was the mock transfer. Both resulted in a satisfied RE and, while satisfied wouldn’t really describe my experience, I WAS taken out to dinner first, and again after….
But the best part? The part that made me literally squeal while still nekkid on the table?
GUESS WHO GOT A TRANSFER CALENDAR??!!
On August 30th, of this very same year that we are now experiencing, the true fun really begins. On that lovely day I will wake up and inject 10 units of Lupron directly into my belly. With a needle. In my belly. Did I mention that it was in my belly? Because it is. Now this is causing more then a little bit of freaking out to happen as this is very very new to me ( I didn’t have this drastic med protocol for either of my previous transfers but followed a more natural protocol) but I am refusing to acknowledge the freak out. So it isn’t happening. I will also start a daily dose of Dexamethasone, also something new to me. On September 8th I will start the twice weekly intramuscular injections of Delestrogen, which are a piece of cake and not something I’m worrying about. I was weepy last time, but the side effects were totally do-able. And I continue on this injection/medication path until……. at least the 22nd. You see, depending on how Jaymee responds, I could continue with the daily Lupron for several more weeks. As soon as we get some great eggs and grow some beautiful embryos to test, I will quit taking the Lupron and begin injecting Progesterone ( as well as administering progesterone….elsewhere). Then transfer. Then peeing a lot on things. Hopefully one of which is a pregnancy test.
This is a VERY different medication schedule then I’m used to. Lots of things happening and, of course, lots of freaking out happening because of the lots of different things. But I am also super excited. Excited to be starting, excited to see the birth of a new Mama, excited to be a part of something so incredible again.
I recently came across this article on Gay Marriage and I’ve got to say, it is so spot on with how I think and feel I’m shocked I didn’t write it. Yes, am full of self. Anyway, I thought i’d pass it on as one: it’s a good conversation starter and two: the more people are talking, the further we’ll come as a society in resolving these issues.
Anyone Out There Who Can Explain the Gay Marriage Thing?
By Jacob Dickerman
Is there anyone out there who can explain to me why gay marriage is a problem?
There are issues which are contentious in this country that I have a definite side on. Abortion, for example. I understand where the other side is coming from, I understand where the argument is, I just don’t agree with the pro-lifers. There are other issues where I’m more confused, mostly because I understand both sides of the issue. Gun control, for example, is an issue that has flipped back and forth in my head so much over the years, it gives me a headache just thinking about it. I get it, you know? On the one hand, they kill people, on the other hand, I believe the founders of our country recognized that this new government they were creating would be fallible and would have the ability to become tyrannical, and they believed that if that happened, the people had the right to change that government. Part of the reason for the second amendment is so that all the guns aren’t in the hands of the military, and to be frank, though I think that point of view is a little crazy and I think we’re further away from it being a necessity than we’ve been since Gingrich decided to try and impeach Clinton due to a BJ, it’s something I can hold on to for that side of the debate. It’s something that makes it clearer to me. But Gay Marriage? No. I don’t get that one at all.
Since, apparently, about fifty percent of the country disagrees with me on this one, I was hoping that a couple of them could actually try and explain a rational reason to me why gay men and women shouldn’t be allowed to get married. What I don’t get about it is that well… my fellow straight people, it’s got nothing to do with us. Except of course it might help out the noun issue when talking to our gay friends of more advanced age. You know what I mean. When you’re hanging out with your gay friend who’s in his mid thirties, and you want to ask about Tom, that guy he’s been with for a decade, the noun’s a pain in the ass. Partner? What is it, are they in business together? Boyfriend? They’re in their mid thirties, the term doesn’t fit. Manfriend? That’s the stupidest damn phrase you can make. You know what term would make it easier? Husband. Of course, until they were married, you couldn’t use that one, but once they were? Husband. Clear pronoun, everyone knows what it means, would make the linguistics of our daily life that little bit easier.
So here’s what I’m looking for in an argument against gay marriage. First off? Clarity. I don’t want to have to read through your argument fourteen times to start to see what it means. As a side note – punctuation and vowels are what make written language work. Please try and make sure that they’re there. Secondly? Logic. I don’t want an emotional argument. Civil rights are not about what you like and what you don’t like. We live in a representative democracy that’s supposed to be built on the equality of all citizens, regardless of creed, race, or orientation. If the country actually is founded on the family, how exactly will it hurt the country to legally recognize a few more families? Third, I want a real argument. Don’t pull shit out of your ass and tell me I can digest it again. Don’t tell me that gay people make bad parents, because that’s a) never been shown to be true, b) in my own anecdotal experience (not really useful data, but you should know my own bias) been shown to be false. And if it’s all about “a kid needs a male and a female parent” than we should just outlaw single parent households now. As soon as one parent dies, the kids are thrown into an orphanage, to protect them from not having a mommy or a daddy.
So what have you got? Economics? I should mention here that weddings are a multi-BILLION dollar industry in this country, and that I have no doubt that making gay marriage legal would throw tons of additional money into that system. Devaluing straight marriage? Why? How is it that two people saying “I love you and I want to be with you forever” effects your marriage in any way, shape, or form? I just want to know if there’s anything in your arguments outside of just being uncomfortable with gay people.
Really, I’m not trying to be facetious in this article. I don’t get it. Really. I don’t get it at all, and I want someone to explain it to me, because I don’t like not understanding things. Realize that we’re not talking about religion here, we’re talking about civil rights. If your church/synagogue/mosque decides to not allow gay weddings, well that’s a private issue, not a public one. They can do that anyway with straight people. They probably won’t, but they can, because they’re private institutions and not bound by the same restrictions as legal ones.
Please. Someone out there, just explain it to me. I don’t like not understanding you. What’s the argument against gay marriage?
Some comments about this issue.
Regarding the vehement stance that Gay rights aren’t due the same respect in defense as the rights of other minority groups:
For 400 years of America, we have been decried from the pulpits and religious meetings. We have been burned at the stakes. We have been hung, beaten, raped, murdered, and destroyed. We have been the subject of fears and trepidation. Parents were told to have us fixed. And they tortured us with electricity charging through our genitals to make us … Read More straight. Our young ones kill themselves just so they can avoid being one of us. And when we escape to make a life for ourselves, they prevent the person of our choice from holding our hand when we leave this world.
And these were the good years. 2000 years before that was worse. I know that there are other groups that have been treated terribly. But don’t start saying ours is not as important or as valuable.
Well, I see it as a civil rights issue for one plain and simple reason: the US Supreme Court has declared marriage as a “basic civil right” (Loving v. Virginia). Therefore, to deny law-abiding citizens access to a basic civil right that is even afforded to convicted felons seems wrong to me.
Someone earlier asked what would happen if we compared this matter to Jewish people instead of African-Americans. The historical precedent for Prop 8 lies in the Nuremberg laws, which stated that Jews were forbidden to marry German citizens. It’s directly analogous as a result. Furthermore, homosexuals were put in concentration camps as well.
The most dangerous aspect of Prop 8 is that we now have precedent for an angry majority to take away rights from anyone whom they decide they don’t like. What’s next? No more suffrage for women? A return to coverture laws and the Chinese exclusion act? All it takes is the votes …… Read More
A Straight Ally for Equality
So! Last Friday I loaded my little family up into the “road trip minivan” and headed north to Portland. Why? Would I willingly and eagerly travel three hours with two toddler/preschoolers in a small hot box.. on purpose?
After dropping our irritated and overly excited children off with my mother ( thanks Mom,) DH and I sprinted over (getting lost a few times) to the hotel where we found, on the curb, the two bubbliest people on planet earth. We shoved them into the back seat and drove them to dinner…. thankfully the people we kidnapped were the right ones and Jaymee, her DH, my DH and I had a FAB meal together. It was like sitting down with old/new friends. So casual and comfortable, right from the start. Perfect.
I ate Alaskan crab legs. Apparently that is a requirement for proper Jaymee-Baby gestation; the consumption of shellfish. Oky Doky, will do… I’ve never had real crab but I am a fan of Deadliest Catch, and this particular tasty treat had arrived fresh from the “Catch” crew themselves, so eating it was almost mandatory when dining if I want to maintain my place in the fan club.
After eating entirely too much and taking way too long to do it ( we were gone over three hours!) we called it a night and headed home for a wee bit of shuteye for the long day ahead of us. Bright and early the next morning we again met up with my fancy new Intended Parents ( and again, got lost) & trekked our mini-van arses on over to the Portland Zoo so that they could get to know my kookie family. Jaymee spent the better part of the day proving over and over what an incredible mother she’s going to be.
My kids hopped in and out of that little stroller buggy a thousand times, walking till tired and riding till too cooped up. She was either pushing them around in that tonnage, or holding a little hand to go explore. My kids LOVED her and her husband is just one of the group, the kids thought he was FUN FUN ( with the fanciest “pretty arms” they had ever seen) & he proved to be the biggest teddy bear we came across that whole day. Soon enough it was time to call it quits and hugs were passed around. I think we all learned what we wanted to learn on this little weekend trip. Jaymee left that day with signed complete contracts in her purse. I left that day with a huge smile in my heart, bubbling with happiness at how awesome this little family already is and how great it’s going to be when they finally have their wee little one to complete it.
So.. Sorry about that. The whole “lets not blog at all about stuff” kind of thing I pulled there. Not at all like……… No, actually wait. That is just like me. Never mind, not sorry.
So! Am told the girls are developmental geniuses, thanks entirely to the fact that my gestational abilities are beyond reproach. Or some such nonsense. Amelia happily holding up her head, Ava close behind her. Am uterine Gawd. Pedestal of own creation. Am literally glowing with pride and get way too much joy out of the frequent pictures sent to me by P-Daddy. Thankful isn’t a big enough word. OK really, I sound so full of myself. Sorry. It’s just, they aren’t my babies and I’m not raising them so this tiny fragment of connection is the only tie I have to claiming some of their awesomeness for myself. Which I’m totally not entitled to but gah. Gonna take it anyway.
Also! Contracts! My fab IM and her weird husband ( and I & my equally weird husband) have diligently had many a belligerent conversation via phone and Internet and voila! Law teams arse kicked! Contracts just about done! By this time next week we will more then likely have things all signed away. Can I get a Whoot and a bit of a squeeeeeeeee??!!
Big worries about going independent? Pshaw. Actually I never had any big worries, I just feel like I was supposed to have big worries, you know? I mean yes, things can ( and maybe did a little) get awkward. We are, after all, discussing compensation, terms of termination, life support, and syphilis. Yes, I said syphilis. Yours truly gets to have a full and detailed STD panel run to make sure the junk is all in order. Which, of course, it is. See reference to deity status of uterus, above. But! Just to make things clear! Well get an official diagnosis of gawd-like quality of other bits and pieces involved in this process. Independent? Shmindependent. Cake, so far.
However, next up in super-fun things happening? Myself and my patient husband will soon be taking an epic vacation to the city of sin to partake in some of said sinfulness ourselves. No worries, my status as clean uterine gawd is not in jeopardy. However, my liver may suffer a wee bit of a setback as I fully intend to spend my first vacation with the husband away from the kids in a near constant state of pickle. They have alcohol by the yard in Vegas, did you know that? Giant cup that clips on to a necklace so you can get so drunk that you don’t even need to hold your beverage up??!! Awesome. It is a reconnection vacation of sorts, and we need it. My daughter is nearly five, the last year and a half of surrogacy was a wee bit straining, and dang. Not pregnant or nursing. Am going to imbibe in my overdue share of hedonistic activities. Thanks. Do the silly grownup acting like a silly child thing. Am very much looking forward to it.
And then? Then? You’ll never guess what happens……………. ha ha ha, teaser post! And knowing me, it could be WEEKS before I fill you in!!
Did you know waiting actually has a sound?
Contracts in the works. Transfer plans thought out. Final booze-filled HURRAH planned in VEGAS with the hubby before I once again host a minor and am therefore unable to sponge up.
Also? Something that gave me a smile this morning:
Sweet little Amelia, looking not so little now-days! The girls seem to be growing like weeds and Daddy is doing a stellar job with them. I can not WAIT to get some live video of the little ladies! I’ll bet they have holding their heads up down pat by now! Three months old! Goodness, how time passes when your busy doing absolutely nothing…. ( hint hint hint to Jaymee’s medical team…..)