Off to my post op appointment. I am just a mess, I am so freaked out. I think I unknowingly signed up for a highly experimental procedure with an even higher fail rate, that is unfixable. I was so hung up on researching the hysterectomy that I blew off the prolapse repairs as routine and didn’t really research further. Now all the pieces are falling in to place and I’m scared. I signed up to be a part of this surgeons study… I figure I’m always one to give feedback, I’m happy to write a review or talk about my experiences with anything, and if my sharing can give someone else more information to make a decision then that’s a good thing. I read through the paperwork and signed on the dotted line, and now I’m pretty sure I’ve ruined myself forever because of it. There was NO informed consent. After joining up with the hysterectomy/pelvic prolapse repair support group it’s all starting to make sense. The procedure he did is NOT FDA approved and has a super high fail rate, and there is no fix. I have a larger than 60% chance of living out the rest of my life with severe pelvic pain because of this mesh. And if I get it removed, there it is more than likely going to cause so much scar tissue that I won’t be able to use my vagina for anything. I am freaking out. there is no other way to put this. I’m going in to the appointment armed with an inch thick stack of research paperwork about the mesh used and the procedure performed, and I have no idea how to address this issue. He’s going to be instantly defensive and all lines of communication will end then. Yah, I’m borrowing trouble, it’s early in the game and maybe I’ll be one of the few that has no problems. But the odds are stacked against me and I am scared. Wish me luck that he has some magical sales pitch that is comforting, because the anxiety over this whole thing is killing me.

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