Three

An amazingly fast and blurry three years ago, two princesses finally rested in Daddy’s arms.

Happy Birthday Ava and Amelia. LOOOOOOVE you!!


Goodness. I promise, the one the girls will get is not blurry and has words that actually match… do you have any idea how HARD it is to get powerpoint to embed a video & graphics & convert the whole mess to something you can actually share? Hard. But worth it, for *my* girls! Also yes, I am aware of how ridiculous I look. It’s okay, I know they like the song…

Just One Small Step

Love this. Love. It’s just one small step in the right direction… but think of how fast we could cross the finish line if we ALL took one step. There is hope for the society my children, bio and surrogate alike, will grow up in.

Babe

Babe

I went to Alabama for sweet Tom’s first birthday, and it was great! Great to see him and great to be seen. It’s been a year, but I know that boy! He’s a squishy ball of love and it was awesome getting a peek at the family I got to help create. More pics as I get permission to post them!! Some day in my lifetime I’d love to get all three families together. Maybe a Disney trip as a group in a few years? Something!

HAVE to share!

Fellow surrogate Danielle revealed her Halloween costume today……

 

 

Good grief girl, You make me proud! And for my readers, if you’ve got a minute… head on over and check out Danielle’s blog! She is carrying Identical Twin boys for her fantastic IF’s, it’s an amazing journey to follow!

The Tiny Giant

One very special little man just turned one! Jaymee and Matt very generously flew me in over the weekend to participate in TomFest 2011, an amazing smorgasbord of fun complete with custom TomFest cups and a bouncy house. That little dude is so loved!! It was a great visit and in true Sabrina fashion I forgot my camera at home. Luckily Jaymee thought of everything and flew in Kimberly, Tom’s official photographer, to document the whole weekend. I can’t wait to see ( and share!) some of the images! It does NOT seem like it’s been a whole year! ( but then again… it seems like a lifetime ago…)

Acknowledged, Yo~

I’ve been thinking about this forever, trying to decide how best to express and remember this amazing journey I’ve been on the last 5 years. Call it base or Redneck, but I chose to share this part of the story of my life on my skin. I want to be a little old wrinkled lady and have a small bit of WOW on my body, both to make me happy and to help me remember. I am so proud of myself, narcissisticly so in many cases, so embracing an outword tribute to myself and those I love was just the perfect thing for me to do.

My daughter and son are the two flowers on the right, red for the heart chakra and orange to represents me. Kael has a blue center and Raegan has fuchsia. The two pink and purple flowers you see to the left are for Ava and Amelia, a matching pair but not identical, one flower has a more orange center and the other more yellow. Tom is represented on the other side ( on top.. my sunny side up boy) with a yellow and teal flower that is in the same shape as the girls. All these flowers are surrounding a Peacock, a symbol of immortality ( as is my part in the creation of each of these children), a symbol of renewal ( as the true heart of *me* was reborn for having experienced the journeys that created these 5 children), and a symbol of integrity and the beauty we can achieve when we endeavor to show our true colors. The peacock is associated with the Hindu deity that represents benevolence, patience, kindness, compassion, and luck. These are all things I strive to embody in my life and relationships, as is the Japanese peacock association as an emblem of love, compassionate watchfulness, good will, nurturing, and kind-heartedness. I’ve been asked why I don’t have an official nod to my Husband, but the truth of the matter is, he is represented by the whole. Without his love, support, giving nature and patience I would not be the person I am today, I would not have had the experiences I’ve had. It has become very very important to have a moment of official recognition for all of these things, and I am amazingly pleased to have done so.

( Better pics will come soon, this was hastily snapped at the tattoo expo where I got this piece finished and just doesn’t do justice to it’s true worth. But right now it’s a gooey sticky mess, so I’ll spare you that…)

Two Years and Nine Months

I had this amazing and magical week. It was a week so full of… well, so full, that I almost have no words. On Monday September 19th, I made the trek up to Portland and made myself at home in the waiting room of the international arrivals area. I’d spent the previous week scrubbing down the ugly from the house, picking and re-picking welcome gifts, arranging appropriate transport, stressing out about sleeping arrangments and, in one particularly insane example, debating and theorizing in the middle of the aisle at Wal*Mart for nearly an hour about SHEET COLOR. Seriously. Both the same? Both different? Similar? Would the one that had no pink be upset about the one that had all the pink? My gawd. It was ridiculous. But it all ended in the waiting room at the Portland International Airport when, after an hour of nervous sitting and fidgeting and poor plays on Words With Friends, I looked up to see one man and two amazingly tiny princesses stumble down the hall after clearing customs from their ten hour flight.

Petter and the ladies had come to visit.

It… Just… wow. I was SO excited to see them! And they were SO tiny! And they looked… okay, I’ll be honest. They looked run over. But really, what two and a half year old wee ones and their tired Pappa wouldn’t look worn out after 10 ( 12? 14 total?) hours stuck on an airplane? But CHIPPER!!! and HAPPY!!! and OMG I can’t believe they were actually here!!!

The week that followed was just……. magic. All that crazy stress for nothing. NOTHING. Family had come to visit, and it was just that comfortable. I got to paint tiny toes and play with sweet baby hair. I got to learn a few words in Norwegian  ( Vaska = purse.  Also Rosa = pink. And finally bæsj which… well the two little ones are potty training. Lets just say it’s both a necessary word to know and funny, if you’re two) I got to giggle at their glee and not worry about how increasingly icky my house was getting through the week as I ignored it in favor of playing. We did a whole bunch of nothing during the week they were here, and as far as I’m concerned that’s just about perfect. Play at the local park, seeing some of the local attractions, hanging out and just being together. We finished off the week at Great Wolf Lodge to wear out the little ones with some water play before they had to climb back on an airplane and fly home. It was way too fast. It was much too short. I miss them with a fresh heart, but I’m glad they are back in their comfortable surroundings, lol! So today I’m just going to sit back, sip my orange-chocolate granita in tribute, and upload some pics.  One thing I’m happy I planned was a session with the amazing Kimberly Teichrow, the photographer that captured Tom’s arrival into this world so sweetly. Here’s my share for today.

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I found myself very surprised when spending time with the girls. I.. feel a connection with them that I didn’t expect to feel. I don’t know if it’s okay to feel this way or right or what, but I feel connected to them. They aren’t my children, my heart isn’t confused in that way. But in a way, they are mine. Just a tiny way, a way that doesn’t make sense to me and is very likely one sided, but my heart, in a corner, claims them. Not as my children, but as children that are mine. Does that even make sense?? These girls have a special spot, all their own. They were my first surrobabes, they were my first twins, they were my first family grown outside of my own. All of those bits of love carve their own little spot out, and holding them and cuddling them and playing with them and watching them… it was like watching my own children. That same corner of my heart gets warm. I didn’t expect that. Didn’t expect how sweet that would feel.
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I was also surprised at how tender it was to see my own children loving on the girls. It wasn’t like they were being sweet to some other kids, some friends child or a random strangers baby. It was like… like they were loving on me. SO WEIRD. I’m messing up this description completely. Lets just leave it at my heart smiled all week, for so many reasons.
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